Modern Day Samaritan Woman

Unfairness/ Indifference!!!

Bitter Pill to Swallow…

A spoon full of sugar compassion makes the medicine go down.

How many times have I heard my kids say “This is not fair” and how many times have I said to them “Life is not fair”…

AND YET

Despite knowing this, and having experienced unfairness myself, it is still a bitter pill to swallow, especially when it comes combined with another bitter pill called “Indifference”…

How bitter it is when you are not the guilty party and yet you are falsely accused, how bitter when you protest just to be told “so what?” maybe not in so many words, but in the attitude reflected towards you.

How much worse is it when the person that is unfair to you is the same person that you EXPECT to have your back and look out for you? The unfairness already feels like a knife plunged deep into your back, BUT the indifference feels like that same knife being twisted around and around…

Jesus also suffered a great deal of “’unfairness” and instead of lashing out at the people who were being unfair, He remained quiet or simply loved them in return. It totally amazes me. The self-control and restraint is a quality I would love to grow into my own character.

Instead, I have a left brain personality, rigid and unbending. What is right is right and what is wrong is wrong. This personality trait certainly assists me to organize my home and work, but does nothing to help me with relationships. I have to constantly remind myself that we are not all left brained, so there will be conflicts in approaches.

Having recently experienced unfairness directed towards me during the past few weeks, I have spent some time thinking about what my reaction should have been versus what it actually was, which was anger and retaliation. Seeking any way to vindicate myself… 

After all, if I don’t have a defender then I would just have to

 defend myself! Right?

Late one night while brooding about pondering these things, Holy Spirit spoke to my heart and reminded me that I am a broken person in a broken world and just as I am lashing out in pain, because of the unfair treatment, so do other people. Instead of being angry at the unfairness and at the person directing the unfairness towards me, I should look beyond the pain and anger and I will see that this person, just like me, is also broken… 

Their reaction is merely their defense; their indifference is merely a means to avoid “feeling”… Perhaps they are just too weary after years of conflict, or worry to plunge too deeply into a situation and prefer the avoidance of pain by being indifferent instead. Who knows what lays behind the brokenness of people.

Holy Spirit ministered to my heart and after a time I felt my resolve to be vindicated melting and in its place I felt genuine compassion towards this very person. I found myself earnestly praying for them. I felt at peace with my situation. It just didn't matter anymore.

I learnt that a little compassion goes a long way in swallowing the bitter pills of unfairness and indifference. Just remembering that we are broken people in a very broken world places all things in perspective.  

Will I react correctly the next time? And yes there will probably be a next time!...

I don’t know, but as I grow and learn I pray that when that time comes that Holy Spirit will open my eyes to what is real (broken person) , instead of what is perceived by me (indifferent, heartless person).

Thankfully, I am not alone in this struggle. Holy Spirit is ever near, ready to whisper to our hearts....

Do you like me struggle to get your character traits in a row? Perhaps you have already mastered self-control and restraint. Or perhaps just like me you have to relearn these lessons over and over again.

   *Hugs* till next time.

    Ariéte