Modern
Day Samaritan Woman
Shattered
Expectations / Glorious Hope!!!
The Return of the
Samaritan Woman!!!
“Courage”
In
order to understand this blog post properly it’s important to read the blog
post explaining the name of this blog first …It can be found here...
If
you have been following my blog you will know that I was remarried just a
little over a year ago and that I was no longer a “real” Samaritan Woman;
however I am sad to say that this marriage was doomed to failure. I’m not going
to dwell on the reasons (to spare the not
so innocent) but suffice to say that step children wield a lot more power
over a parent than is usually apparent.
Yes
my heart and life are shattered because I had truly believed my long wait for a
life partner was over and I had all sorts of expectations for the future…
Laying them down has been difficult. I know from previous experience that in
order to take up new dreams you have to lay the old ones down. I know this; but
I do not like this…
Laying
down dreams is never an easy feat.
I
can so vividly imagine the original Samaritan Woman of John 4 standing outside
her home, on a dusty road, clutching her belongings, wringing her hands
together, struggling to breathe because her chest was so constricted with pain
and wondering where to go…the many times she found herself between lives and
between husbands…
Genesis 3:16
To the
woman He said, “……. Yet your desire and longing will be for your husband, And he will rule [with
authority] over you and be
responsible for you.” (AMP) Emphasis my own
I
can relate to her because I was her and I am her again…I stood on my own dusty
road, so many thousands of years later, and bid farewell to my hubby, (my
heart) whom I had adored, my beloved farm animals, my life and beautiful dreams,
and found myself wringing my own hands, my own heart constricted with pain that
made breathing unbearable, and then drove away from them and everything I had invested
into for the past year and a half…
I
have to say I did have a choice. I could have stayed and permitted myself to be
misused and emotionally abused or I could make the necessary; but difficult
choices in order to find peace of mind and retain the last remaining self-respect
that I still possessed.
I CHOSE
THE LATTER.
I am
in no ways endorsing divorce or advocating for it. (To know my heart for my marriage
please read this). For those who know my heart I am so in favour of marriage,
of sticking together through the good and the bad, for better and for worse;
but I am intelligent enough to know that it must come equally from both sides. That
compromise and sacrifice must be a joint effort. A marriage must comprise of God,
Husband and Wife…No one else…
And just
like that… I was the Samaritan Woman again…shamed, discarded, disposable…The sacrifices
and investment I had made suddenly meaningless…
I found
myself between lives. I no longer belonged in the life I had; but I didn’t have
a new one either…
During
the December holidays and into the New Year, I spent my time largely on my own…
and in my private world and in my private time the word “Courage” became my mantra…
Psalm 27:14
“Wait for and confidently expect the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage;
Yes, wait for and confidently
expect the Lord” (AMP)
My
mind again dwelled on the original Samaritan Woman of John 4 and I wondered how
many hours and days she spent on her own…How many dreams did she have to lay
down?
How much inner strength did she have to possess to get up in the morning
again? How much sorrow did she conceal between fake smiles? How many days would
go by before she heard from loved one who were too busy living their own lives?
I can understand her loneliness and desperation. I can understand why she made
the choices she made because like her I do not like to be alone. I have love to
give, lots of it, but no one to give it to…
Until,
my Maker reminded me that He is near. I can love Him… He will be my husband. He
is my provision, my future and He is the One who will ensure my safety…
Hosea 2:16
“In that coming day,” says the
Lord, “she will call me ‘My Husband’
instead of ‘My Master.’ (TLB)
Emphasis my own
He
wants to hear from me. He loves to hear my tales and as I draw nearer to Him,
He draws nearer to me and while I share my sorrow, my hopes and my insecurities
with Him, He draws me into His lap and holds me close…
He
whispers to me that He has a Glorious hope and future in store for me…
He
is the One that brushes my hair off my forehead when He gently kisses me
goodnight and tucks me in at night to sleep…
He
is the One who watches while I sleep and guards me from evil.
He
is the One who wakens me in the morning, painting a beautiful picture in the
sky just to show me how much He loves me.
The story
of the Samaritan Woman has not come to an end yet. I am she and I still live,
as do thousands of other women just like me…
Yet
we do not need to despair…
We
have the glorious hope…in Jesus…
The
Lover of our Souls…
*Hugs* till next time.
Ariéte
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