Tuesday, 3 November 2015

Modern Day Samaritan Woman

Professional Wait ‘ers?

We all go through various seasons in our lives, at different times, for some of us the seasons pass quickly from one thing to another thing and for others the changes take longer, but what about the season that does not pass? I have read a lot about the various challenges people face, but I haven’t read anything about a season that 
just does not pass.

For me that season is waiting. I am a “Wait’er” A professional “Wait”er

My season of waiting began about forty years ago and despite experiencing many life changing circumstances during this time period, good and bad, my “waiting” season has not passed. Thankfully, I am not always consciously aware that I am waiting, but recently my awareness of waiting has flared up again very strongly and I realized that I am still waiting.

This brought about the question. Is this a bad thing? Waiting for most of us, is usually considered a waste of time. We don’t like queues or waiting for others in traffic. The month feels long when we are waiting for our pay checks and people who are tardy for appointments are considered as wasting our time, so in general waiting feels like a negative thing.

How does waiting feel? Waiting to me feels like being driven to the edge of sanity sometimes, especially when I don’t know how long I will be waiting for. Ask any mother whose child is in emergency surgery? Or the patient waiting for the results of blood tests? The prisoner waiting for time to pass to expected freedom. The terminal patient, having been told time is short and waiting to die. Or any aged person waiting for a visit from loved ones?

One more hour, one more day, one more week, one more month, one more year, one more decade, one more century, or one complete lifetime. Waiting indefinitely is enough to drive someone right over the edge.

I have given these times of waiting lots of names during my life. I’ve called it patience, endurance, perseverance, faithfulness and even loneliness because most of the time this waiting has been very lonely exercise, when others have not understood exactly. Others have also given my “waiting” names like ignorance, stupidity, wasteful, indifference, even peculiar.

However, by whichever name it is called, my waiting season has continued unabated through the years, until recently when it has been brought to focus in my life again.

Can I really be the only one in this constant waiting mode? I can’t believe it and I don’t believe it. Why do we not speak of it or hear of it more often? Am I ignorant? Am I stupid? Or am I just peculiar? Am I wearing a mask or are others wearing masks, smiling and confident, going through life’s motions while waiting, waiting and waiting some more?
I believe there are many professional “wait”ers…We just aren’t really aware of one another.

Waiting has several sounds. 

Waiting can sound like the distant barking of a dog…constant, continuous, nagging…but distant enough away not to directly annoy but a reminder none the less.

Waiting can sound like a radio playing incessantly in the background…you hear tiny fragments of songs playing and spoken words, white noise really, but the general gist of the conversations goes unnoticed.

Waiting can sound like the whir whir of an overhead fan, going round and round at a constant steady speed, moving but going nowhere fast.

Waiting can chip away steadily at your resolve and sanity, bit by bit eroding your resistance, as the steady dripping of water erodes rock surfaces, until you find yourself at the edge, but at the edge of what exactly?

The enemy of our souls often uses these times of waiting and our awareness of waiting to whisper into our ears, telling us lies, about ourselves, our lives, our loved ones and even our God.

And if we are not careful to shut out these whispers we will be swept away in these lies. 
1 John 5:21Little children (believers, dear ones), guard yourselves from idols—[false teachings, moral compromises, and anything that would take God’s place in your heart].” AMP

Because we are told to WAIT on the Lord.

Psalm 27:14 
“Wait for and confidently expect the Lord; Be strong and let your heart take courage; Yes, wait for and confidently expect the Lord.” AMP

The truth is we are waiting…I am waiting to be reunited with my Creator. Until then we will never be fulfilled, never be entirely satisfied with our existence and life. I have been waiting to truly belong… to belong somewhere and to belong to someone for almost as long as I can remember…waiting that has seemed endless.

There is no possession, occupation, parent, child, husband, wife or sibling that can fill the void that only God can fill.  Yes I am a Child of the Most High God and He certainly is my God and King, but until I am in His actual presence, I simply don’t belong fully and completely on this planet or even in this existence. I am peculiar and I feel alien, even when in the company of people I call my own and know well.

I have heard His voice and I have His seen His face beaconing me to follow Him. He called me as a young girl and ever since then I have been following but also waiting…I have been restlessness most of my life…

Waiting to return to His presence…

1 Peter 2:9
“But ye are a chosen generation, a royal priesthood, an holy nation, a peculiar people; that ye should shew forth the praises of him who hath called you out of darkness into his marvellous light;” KJV

So although the waiting is hard, lonely and long, my prayer is that my restlessness will not cause me to miss the mark altogether. Rather, that my restlessness will cause me and my loved one’s to press in, to press on, and to press home…to the place where every person ever created has a place of belonging…Where the waiting will cease forever and we will be in the presence of the One to whom we will know fullness and complete belonging…

Do you also feel as if you have been waiting for something, someone, forever? Perhaps that’s the point. We should all be professional wait”ers…Waiting and yearning for the true lover of our souls…Surely He is Worth waiting for.

*Hugs* till next time.